Form 4 2012

2012. It's the most fastest year I've ever through. Not that the time is swifting so fast, but I just don't know why I feel that way. 2 months I stayed at Setapak Indah, then moved to SM Sains Selangor. Everything happened not on the purpose.

I've met lots of people. What I've learnt is not to put trust on people too easily because not everyone will be there for you when you need them. Not everyone appreciate your trust. And none of them will treat you right if you don't put effort to do so.

And one more thing is FORM 4 YEAR IS NOT A HONEY MOON YEAR like people mention. It's just like you free from the lower form subjects and you can be ala ala gangsta dude and raised by junior because they look you as "wow form 4 dudes are so hot" (entah lah. Maybe) and that's all. You got some NEW subjects to be handle actually. DIFFICULT ONES. You never learn them more detail when in lower form. Need to struggle and have practises more haih serious.

If you take pure science, get ready to be a dead meat to face BIO, CHEM, ADD MATH AND PHYSICS. So far, I never get D or fail for my elective subjects. Alhamdulillah.

So dakdak pmr sekalian, don't take it easy tau. Tomorrow is a big day. It'll help you to choose which stream you'll be taking next year. Kalau kau ambik pure science, mati doh hahahaha.  Takdelah. Gurau je.

That's all. Good luck!

Everyone is a stalker

Indeed. I'm a stalker. You're a stalker. We are all stalkers. Whoever has account(s) on social network(s) is a stalker.

But here I don't mean that an annoying person who follows someone over a period in such irritating way. Haha no. What I mean is someone who is being observant on a person over a short period at least but not in irritating way. Just to know his/her news on internet, not in real life (because you're not a nosy paparazzi who chases after a star) and that's all.

Like you wanna know your friend's news so you view his/her profile. You wanna see your cousin's photos so you view his/her album. You wanna know what your partner/ex is doing so you scroll his/her tweets all over your page. You must have done those things at least once in your life, rite? So this means you're a stalker! Hahaha gotcha.

 Tak mengaku lagi? Hahahaha. Or maybe ..........

Okay lah. Kiranya you're just an unpaid private investigator lah kan. Because you just want to investigate someone. Haaaa admit it :p

Oh note that it should be "Aku stalk kau". Not "Aku stalker kau" ye :) Because stalker is a person and stalking is perbuatan. 

Bye xx

Emotional

Bad. I'm bad. I'm trynna be better but people underestimate me. I'm trynna change but society discourage me. I do everything but people still judge.

For example, they give a sidelong glance whenever I pass by them. They give a jerk expression whenever I face them. They don't accept me into their circle because I know from the way they treat me. They don't even make eye contact whenever I speak to them. What a society ...


Like now, I sometimes wear specs and sometimes contact lens but they are like "ai, dulu kau taknak bukak spec sekarang dah tak pakai" "aku rasa awkward tengok kau tak pakai spec" SO? DOES IT EVER CONCERN ANYONE? NO RITE?

See. They judge me. They underestimate me. They avoid me. Because they're annoyed with me.

And I know lots of people out there hate me. Society dislike me. They throw me away. I know I have a bit perangai keriau like I'm stubborn and a bit mild-tempered, I don't speak nicely to people. But I'm trynna change. I wanna change to a better person. But hey if they don't give me chance, how can I proceed so? I wanna change for better. Gimme chance, pls.

I examine that hating people will get no benefit at all. NOTHING. You just plant the hatred in your heart and that's all. It just wastes your time.

I don't have time to hate people. I'm too busy loving people I love. If you hate me, just straight away tell me okay. I'll try to change for the sake of mine.

Friends. Buddies. Fellows. I'm losing them. It's not that I fight with them but I don't even get the reason why they're leaving. Close friendship is getting loose because lack of greetings though. Thanks to those who still stay in my life. Chumy-chumy members, I love you.

Fatem, Aeman, Fatin Nadiah, Eiya, Fify, Elaneez, Fateha, Sue. Seriously, I miss you guys a lot. Xx

My life is miserable. If you're in my shoes, you know how it feels to be me. I need Allah's guidance to keep me strong and be faith in life. That's all I need.

p.s. this is general and not dedicated to anyone specific

Curse words. Girls, please.

In daily life, you'll definitely have to speak. You have convo with people. You talk. You pray. And you curse either on purpose or not, but it has been your habit. Bad habit. "Sial lah this thing doesn't work fxck." "Hahahaha bodoh ke apa bxbi gila orang itu." See. Curse lagi.

Okay calm down. I also curse okay. But I lesser it now. It's a bad habit I know, especially for a girl. Hey doesn't it sound offended and rude when you hear a girl curses? I used to curse a lot before. Harsher than a bij curses her life. Rougher than a thug curses his weed. And I once gave up in life so I cut myself. And the scar still appear but thank god it fades now.

I regret. I don't want to repeat the same mistake.

Imagine if you curse sial more than 44 times. And you feel like your life suck. You don't feel happy. You do pursue for happiness but you don't find it. Why? Because you ask for it. You curse and unfortunately, God granted it. So what to do? Pray for better. You can change your fate by praying.

To the girls out there, please I beg you. Mind your words. It would sound nicer if you hold your tongue when you're angry or shock and change the words to a better word. Like "Omg it hurts" "Alhamdulillah I feel nice" "Ya Allah why this thing doesn't work" Haa sounds nicer, ain't?

Girls and words. Words and girls. Curse bloody words don't fit you. Seriously. And to guys too. We girls have our own pride kan. Supposedly girls have to be more polite so people will respect you okay :) and I also remind this to myself

True story bro

Everyone has feelings. Everyone has their own love stories. So do I. But that was a long time ago dude. Now I'm comfortable being around w myself surrounded by family and fellas. Yep, no boyfriend. No soulmate. No huney darla or such. Just me and myself. No no no no need to pity about lol I'm comfortable with it.

If a girl is in her bunch of her mates, probably the main topic they will talk about is BOYFRIEND/LOVE/RELATIONSHIP. "How are you and him?" "We're good, just doing fine" blablabla. And those who are single in the group are just like okay let's just listen to the story. Nod. This is so typical. Ikr. Because I've been thru hahaha.

But opposite to my group, I mean in Setapak Indah, we all got no boyfriend for now. For now je okay coming soon don't know yet lulz. Bak kata Shamin "Aku tak tau lah kita ni bawak suey ke apa hahaha" So we ofen gossip about "hotties" in school, make fun of each other, hang out. Hm I miss them :(

Before this I got a guy bestie. I love him so much as my brother. We shared secrets, talked a lot, on the phone for hours and sometimes we did act like couple till the teachers got misthought and sounded us indirectly hahahaha wth doh seriously that was a long time ago. Good times. Good moments. But sadly after we have moved to new school, *sigh* our friendship is getting loose. We don't share secrets. We don't talk. We don't greet. I did greet him but he treated me like a stranger. And the SADDEST PART is WE ACT AKWARD.

Maybe he has found a new girlfriend. Or maybe he is shy w me. Or maybe he gotta be a hottie now. Idk. Maybe. Too many maybe and thoughts in my head but whatever it is, I miss the old him.

"Season changes. People change. But memories stay."

The saying is right. Because it exactly happens to me now. Maybe he did changed but he never fade in my mind.

Good starter

Hi peeps. It's been a long time I didn't blogging. Ever since I got into a new school. SEKOLAH MENENGAH SAINS SELANGOR (SMSS) Yep an SBP. Life changes. But still have to move on. We still have a long journey to achive our dream, ain't? I'm a dreamer. I need to find ways to achive my dream. To be a successful lady one day. May the odds be ever in our soul.

Oh it's december already. What a good starter. Well what I mean is a good start to find a way to get me skinnier LOL this is serious :( I'm afraid of gaining weight during these holidays. *sigh* I need to work out more. Need to focus on the thighs and hips part hahaha since the fat gathers there. (LOL yeye je nanti tengok lah ayam ayam je nanti xD)

Anyway, it's holiday already but I got LOADS OF HOMEWORK TO COMPLETE. Geezzzzz teachers are really torturing me or what -.- Okay lah, gotta sacrifice for preparation for SPM next year lah kan what to do. OMG SPM. That means I still have a YEAR to finish my school session dude. A YEAR. Not a short period tho. Pejam celik pejam celik then it's SPM already amboi tak ke mampus tu dengan tak prepare pape lagi dari awal. In that case, I need to prepare myself from earlier. Thanks teacher for giving that homework :'''')))) *sense the sarcasm* *dalam hati sumpah seranah hahaha k tak* Shhh just keep it quiet already alright? ;)

Actually the reason why I'm joining back in blogging world is that, I was passing by a blog when doing a research for my homework then I remembered, uhh I got a blog why didn't I update it as much as I did before. (Did I? But at least before this I'm a lil active blogger tho) ((NO)) okay okay. The older much much older posts have been deleted due to yknow old stories no need to ungkit balik kan :p All this while I just express my thoughts and my feelings thru Twitter and Tumblr. So yep, here I am. I love my Tumblr ♡

Welcoming myself back to blogging world so hi there bloggers, and readers :) *applause to me* *sadly nobody gives a damn* lol k. Anyway I'd appreaciate your effort if you follow me ;) hihi may the odds be ever in your favour xx

p.s. Ignore my grammatical errors